So…this is it. This is the post I’ve been prepromoting all week, the poem I’ve described as the epitome of this challenge, the pinnacle of positive poetry–a poem about happiness itself.
I actually wrote this one a couple months ago; believe me, I’ve TRIED to write a better poem about happiness, but at the moment, in the mix of all my adolescent fervor, I’m gosh-darn confused about what happiness is, exactly–this poem explores that confusion in the least negative way possible. (You should have seen the other ones I was writing…)
Also, this poem is SUPPOSED to and NEEDS to be spoken word, and it is very much bugging me that it’s not at the moment. I AM looking into audio hosters that would allow me to embed it in here, but for some reason the very thought of posting my voice on the internet makes me feel quite vulnerable. There is also the indisputable fact that I will hate how it sounds if I DO upload it–recordings of your voice never sound right, know what I mean??
Without further ado…
We study fear
and isolation, depression, death
so we have data to turn to in our most desperate hours
some small thread of logic that feels soothing to weave into the folds of our brains
We study terror
if only because that thread will stitch us back to a state in which we no longer have to analyze
When you are drunk with love you don’t want to think of
the hormones coursing through you, the biological need for reproduction
it defies science entirely!
and then it
There are textbooks
written on the theory of love–
But–I am writing this poem and I want it to be beautiful.
I am not writing this poem to trigger all the pleasure centers of your brain.
I am aware
that we have specially advanced brains for calculating and discovering
but we also have hearts that bleed
and I am also aware that that’s much too woo-woo to include in a poem about science so I’ll just say this–
When I’m elated, jovial, ecstatic, thrilled,
impassioned, joyful, cheery, radiant, overjoyed,
on Cloud 9 in 7th heaven,
You look at me and affirm, “Dopamine.”
But I want to ask you
why it is,
that we have so many other words for it.
Ahhh…so positive. 😉 I have a feeling that my poetry didn’t get MUCH more positive over the course of this project, but I did learn some interesting things about myself through this eight-day foray into…poetray (couldn’t resist, sorry); I’m thinking I’ll do a recap of the whole experience later.
(Speaking of recaps, what on earth happened to my Monthly Recap for January 2013? I’m sorry. Without running to keep me sane, I appear to be going a little bit senile…in my teens. Nothing really awesomesauce occurred, at any rate, so don’t think you’re missing out on too much :P).
–The Girl in the Orange