Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry. Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.Sorry.
I think that’s exactly 100 sorry’s–not counting that last one just there–but, well, there’s no way I’m going back and checking. If you count and come up with another number, prize* for you!
So, ergh. I know this thing
died went into hibernation, and I know that was a bad move on many accounts and I also know that it was entirely my fault. I HAVE NOT POSTED SINCE SEPTEMBER 15TH LAST YEEAAR I MEAN THERE IS OBVIOUSLY SOMETHING WRONG WITH THIS.
The abbreviated version of the story is this: I actually did have a lot of ideas for posts and such that I would sit on, and then try to go about compiling, but something about the last few months (new school? insecurity?) let my inner perfectionist take an extreme hold and really start to stifle my…everything. I couldn’t write a post or snap pictures to put up here without them being absolutely perfect, and obviously that was never going to happen, no matter how many hours I spent slaving over writing and photo and video editing. Hence, no posts.
I’m going to do something insane here and not edit this draft once I finish typing it up. It’s kind of nerve-wracking to think about, actually (ugh, I am so completely Type A), but it’ll probably be good for me. Actually, if I want to jump back into this whole blogging thing, which I do, this is probably going to be the only way I’ll have time to do it–maybe I can type up a few posts per week, but I’m certainly not going to pour as much time into tweaking and nitpicking as I’m used to.
THERE IS TOO MUCH HOMEWORK.
(If you can count up the number of times I’ve ever complained of that on here, I will actually legitimately send you a $15 gift card or something. We can work something out.)
Actually, I’m on winter break right now, and it’s New Year’s Eve, so it feels like a good time to jump back into this.
I know running TGITO was A Good Thing. It gave me writing and social marketing and photography practice, it probably made me A Better Person, and it definitely helped me Feel Better About Myself. (This is hard for perfectionists, you’ll have to understand.) I let it bottom out, and that was A Bad Thing. I don’t really have a constant in my life, something that always makes me smile and that I do just for me, anymore. I needed to cut off blogging for a few months because it was ceasing to be that thing, instead becoming very stressful and anxiety-inducing and altogether just too much effort.
Once you hit high school you turn into a lazy sack of caffeine and societal angst.
I wasn’t warned.
Anyway, though, in spite of it all, I’m back. I took a long enough hiatus that it feels a bit nostalgic to open up WordPress again, and also utterly terrifying. My inner perfectionist is wringing her hands over the fact that this post serves really no point except to make a dramatic reentrance, but I suppose she’ll have to learn to be okay with that. I definitely want to continue to blog! I’m not exactly sure what I’ll start posting about from now on, but we’ll get into that later. 🙂
It’s the new year. (Speaking of, Happy New Year, everybody!!) 365 blank pages that I’ll really try hard not to let whoosh by unfilled like 2013. I don’t want to proclaim any grand resolutions here, for obvious reasons (namely the flaws of human nature), but I do want to keep writing and posting and I do want to approach the coming year with some sort of achievable goal, instead of just waking up every day and winging it (which as it turns out doesn’t really work for me).
2014 promises to be magical. Justin Bieber is retiring from music. Peter Capaldi has already argued with Steven Moffat over the sexism in Doctor Who scripts. I’m sportin’ some pretty awesomesauce new glasses. The little ponytail in my hair doesn’t look quite so awkward now. I’m learning how to navigate the murky waters of the high school social scene, and hellyes I’m flubbing up a lot along the way, but learning is never a bad thing. Plus my birthday was 22 days ago, so I’m rocking a brand-spankin’-new age to take for a spin and mess it up as much as possible in what is hopefully a joyous and eclectic explosion of orange.
Also I’m back.
Have a lovely day! 😀
(You should leave a comment on this post if you’re reading it, just cuz I feel kinda lonely and hope everyone didn’t forget about me. 🙂 I don’t care at all what it says. Resolutions, the color of your pinky toenail, your favorite liquid to consume, your innermost secrets, musings on the Novikov Self-Consistency Principle. Really. Just write a thing. I love you. Thanks bunches. Best wishes.)
*prize may or may not be only my eternal adoration and gracious admission of defeat